Jeanne Lou Sept 15, 2017
Sept 15 is a memorable day for me. 7 years ago, it was the day I got married with the love of my life Stan. I was 8 months pregnant at the time, and I thought I’d never be happier. But just a few weeks after I was proven wrong.
I gave birth to a twins and we named them Lizza and Lizzy. For a few days it was rainbows and butterflies and I hoped that it would last. Life was never perfect, but with my family around me, I could never ask for more.
My world shattered only 2 months after I gave birth. Police officer came knocking at my door. And my beloved Stan? He was hit by a drunk driver. Our family van was crushed under the weight of a truck. He was confirmed dead on the spot.
At first I was in denial. I slammed the door on their face. I didn’t cry. I just went to the nursery and stares down to my kids. I wanted to try and call my husband’s phone to prove that this is just the cosmos playing one big joke. But I got scared. I got scared that he may answer and he may get himself in an accident while driving. It was almost time for him to go home then and I know he was on his way. But he never came.
The only people that passed through my door that day were my parents. They came and just hugged me. Then all things became real. After that was just a series of tableau with me just watching from a corner.
“What now?” I asked myself. My world turned upside down then. I got confused. Angry. I was mad at the world. But then I realized, there is so much I have to live for. My daughters are there, waiting for me to get a grip. To say that it was the longest weeks of my life was an understatement. It was hard coping up, I was the first to admit that but I have to. I have my daughters to think of.
Eventually I pulled myself off from that dark abyss I fell into when husband died. How? Our friends showered me with love unimaginable. It was the only thing that kept me going. And until now.
One realization is that, things never get easy. You just get used to the pain and learn to live with it everyday. But with friends and loved ones around, the pain would be bearable. So I will always be thankful.